Golden Globes 2012

The Hollywood awards season really gets revved up with the Golden Globes and ends with the Oscars, although as that pesky host Ricky Gervais said at the start of the show, "The Golden Globes are to the Oscars what Kim Kardashian is to Kate Middleton.  Meowwwwww... but so true.


I like the GGs but perhaps not for the proper reasons.  I am not so interested in the awards (unless one happens to grab me and two did this time) and they are no barometer for any other awards.  What they almost always are is fun.  That comes the fact that the Hollywoodites sit at large round tables with their buddies (usually those from the same films or television shows sit together) and they drink.  And during commercials they schmooze.  So most of them get pretty giddy and they bring that game to the entire proceedings.  Usually.

The Hollywood Foreign Press is the brains behind the awards and is presently composed of 93 members who do all of the voting for excellence in movies and television, both foreign and domestic.  My own opinion is that it is weighed a little more toward foreign, noting it is the foreign press not the domestic press.

They not only divide the pie into movies and television but, in most categories, further divided into drama and then, music and comedy.  Where would Cabaret have fallen, considering it was a musical drama?  Why was My Week with Marilyn put into musical and comedy when it is just a little of both and whole lot more drama?    With bemused regularity they also bestow nominations on odd films...  take, for example, last year with the Johnny Depp-Angelina Jolie dud The Tourist.  And actors often end up in categories that are just plain wrong.  A few years back Kate Winslet received two awards... best actress for Revolutionary Road and best supporting actress for The Reader, a film in which she supported no one.  Furthermore she won Oscar's best actress for The Reader.  Still with me?  It's all so confusing.

I usually prefer to watch all awards show by myself.  I've done the mobs and typed up some smashing ballots and while, ok, that can be fun, it's also too noisy.  The only sounds I usually want to hear are my own... an occasional yippee and the usual groan.  Oh, who is she sleeping with?  Oh, that film was a piece of... I mean, it wasn't very good.  If you're reading this and I have watched an awards show at your house, well, of course, I didn't mean that you were too noisy.  You silly thing.  Really.  Let's do lunch.

So here I was with my munchies, in my favorite sweats... they're green like all the ladies gowns... or is that some old guacamole?  Oh never mind, I am settled in to watch the pre-show, first on E! and then as soon as I can, a redial to NBC.  I don't watch this for the gowns-- I don't care what you think-- I watch it for the people.  Although alright, just for a quick sec, I did think Shailene Woodley (Clooney's costar in The Descendants) was smokin' hot in her festive ensemble.  I also liked the threads on Claire Danes, Salma Hayek and Reese Witherspoon.  I also saw some hideous blue and white thing on Sarah Michelle Gellar that looked like Jackson Pollack painted it when he'd polished off a pint or two.  But look, I just do NOT do gowns.  This was a stretch.  Maybe I should overcome that but don't look for it too soon. 

(If you do want to look for it... some gown talk... check out my good bud in sunny California, fashion champion Billy Moda, because I am sure he will speak of these things and certainly more eloquently than I ever could.  You can access his blog on this one.)

Maybe just a head's up to newcomer Rooney Mara, the title star of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.  Do something with your hair.  You pissed me off.  These affairs are about glamour.  A ratty little ponytail with a rubberband from your desk drawer just doesn't cut it.  If I wanted to see that, I would peek in my nextdoor neighbor's window.

Someone named Adam Levine took umbrage to interviewer Giuliana Rancic asking him personal questions (that inane babble that is too often trotted out as stimulating conversation) about his relationship and when she wouldn't stop, he got testier.  I just love live television, don't you?

It wasn't long before Carson Daly was interviewing Sir Elton John (I would soooo like to whisper to you what I thought of his looks but my good karma levels are down so I have got to be careful).  But he hissed about Madonna being in the same category as he was and whatever he said was so naughty and likely disrespectful that it was bleeped.  (I later made one of those loud yippee sounds when she won.)

So on comes Ricky Gervais, sweetheart that he is, and says "So where was I?"  For those of you who spent the last year in the south of Borneo without Wi-Fi, he offended most of the local gentry last year on the GGs (please feel free to use that term yourself) but being the Gordon Geckos they are (hey, another GG... where's Leslie Caron?), but notice they brought him back once again to spew his venom.  Ratings, ratings, ratings.

Now listen, I do actually like him and think he's funny as hell, but he was venomous and crass and I don't think those fragile Hollywood egos can take much more of it.  I saw some interesting looks among the glitterati and Gervais said something in his intro of Antonio Banderas and Salma Hayek that was bleeped for quite a long time and when Banderas came on stage, he looked annoyed as he responded in speedy Spanish.

The awards themselves were an array of the good, the who cares and the ugly.

The entire show would have gotten a thumbs-up from me simply because Michelle Williams won for My Week with Marilyn.  Brava, Sweetheart.  And while this blog is not called My Romance with Television, I was thrilled that Jessica Lange won for my favorite new series, American Horror Story.  I love this actress.  I'd give her an award for opening her eyes in the morning.  I am itching to do a posting on her. 

No more talk of television after I say you blokes across the pond have given us one of the best miniseries I have ever seen in Downton Abbey and I am so delighted these 93 members bestowed the prize on this it.

An early winner was my old friend, Captain Von Trapp... I mean Christopher Plummer... for his supporting role as Ewan McGregor's
gay father in Beginners, a sweet little film I now own.  He thanked McGregor who was sitting at that same round table, calling him affectionately a scene-stealing swine.

I am not the biggest Woody Allen fan in the whole world.  I have liked his films more in the past 7-8 years and none more so than Midnight in Paris so I was delighted he won the writing award.

I am not surprised that The Artist won best musical/comedy (it is sooo what the GGs would do) but I don't think it should have.  Avid readers of these pages already know that.  Congrats to the animated Jean Dujardin for his win in this film.  The Descendants won for best drama and I do agree with that one.

And Georgie-Boy won for the latter film and I agree with that also.  I happen to think George, who is never bad, was never better.  He thanked fellow nominee Michael Fassbender (sexy star of Shame) for taking over for George in the frontal nudity business.  What movie did George Clooney do that?!?!  Or was he kidding?  If you know, add a comment.

A round of applause to Octavia Spencer on her supporting award (and her acceptance speech) for The Help... so well-deserved.  I was only sorry that Viola Davis didn't win in the best actress category for the same film.

And Miss Meryl, acting royalty, one of America's natural resources, has done it again... her 9th GG.  Astonishing.  Iron Lady is not on my must-see list, although I know she turns in an amazing performance because, let's be honest here, she always does. 

The evening's most touching moment came, as it usually does, with the presentation of the Cecil B. DeMille award (outstanding  contribution to the film industry) to Morgan Freeman.  The esteemed Sidney Poitier (who had some odd moments) and regal Helen Mirren presented the well-deserved Freeman with the award.

We'll revisit some of these same people and films again for the Oscars on February 26.



NEXT POST:  Thelma and Agnes