REVIEW: Fifty Shades Freed

Directed by James Foley
2018 Romance Drama
1 hour 45 minutes
From Universal Studios

Starring
Dakota Johnson
Jamie Dornan
Eric Johnson
Eloise Mumford
Rita Ora
Luke Grimes
Brant Daugherty

Let's hear it for this poster.  If it doesn't speak to you in some uplifting manner (look at it again and for longer, perhaps), get back to me and I'll speak with you privately.

Yes, there's still some gratuitous sex.  There's some sex that's not gratuitous and some of that has gotten a little more tender than in the previous installments.  Yes, there are still implements of affection and sex in public and sexy, near-naked bodies.  (Oh, I yawn in your general direction.)  All of that is the good news.  The bad news?  The trilogy of rich folks' romps has come to an end.

Ah, thank God, some of you are saying.  I understand that point of view but I do not walk among you.  Reviews I've read on this series are never kind.  So many naysayers blather on about how it's the worst ever, the most boring ever, call out the troops to find every copy and burn them. How could anyone make such a stupid series?  Silly, glitzy, soft-core porn.  The two leads have zero chemistry and on and on.    

Oh lighten up... seriously.  No one in his or her right mind is confusing this with The Shape of Water, Call Me by Your Name or Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri.  It's not up for an Oscar nor were the first two installments, but let it be said that if these films didn't have something to offer, there wouldn't have been three of them.  Yes, for the studio there's a huge financial gain but for me it's just a fun, stylish, entertaining, voyeuristic, good time.  

Before the opening credits have concluded, Christian and Anastasia are married and off on a honeymoon in some of the world's most stunning playgrounds.  His private jet and yacht are at their beck and call.  The clothes (or lack thereof), the apartments, the estates, the cars, the offices... all a feast for the orbs. I've commented on this in my reviews of Fifty Shades of Grey and Fifty Shades Darker... these are gorgeously designed and photographed movies and... don't laugh... but that's one of the reasons I like seeing them. 

Two more reasons are Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson.  If they don't have chemistry, then I have chemistry for them.  Either way, they pull me in to their vertical and horizontal imaginings and I find myself watching them with a smile on my face.  By now it's like running into two horny, old friends.

The plot, such as it is, has gotten a little darker in that her old boss, Jack Hyde (Eric Johnson), has become more sinister.  Additionally, life has dealt the couple another problem... a wee little one is soon on the way.  Neither is particularly happy about it although Christian is downright bummed.

There is a touching collection of images at the end showing the couple in various shots from all three films... a nice way to say goodbye.

This third installment and the second were filmed at the same time... therefore all technical credits are the same for both films.

I have seen Dornan on various television shows doing interviews to drum up interest but wonder why Johnson never does any publicity.  I'd like to see them work together in something else one day.

Happy Valentine's Day.



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